Begin With the End in Mind

Homeschooling is a long road, and some days it feels like you're just surviving. But when you begin with the end in mind you can make choices that truly serve your family’s goals. Here’s a heart-to-heart on how to stay grounded, even when it gets hard.

Homeschooling is full of beautiful moments---snuggles on the couch with books, spontaneous field trips, deep conversations you’d never get to have during a rushed school drop-off. But let’s be honest: it’s also messy. It’s hard. There are days (weeks? months?) when it feels like you’re spinning your wheels, unsure if anything is really working.

That’s why it matters so much to begin with the end in mind.

I don’t mean “the end” like graduation or a test score or even getting into a good college (though those might be part of it for your family). I mean the real end; the reason you chose this path in the first place.

For me, the end is this: I want my kids to grow up confident in who they are, independent, and free to explore the world on their own terms. I want them to study what lights them up, without the pressure to fit into a mold that never really suited them anyway.

It’s not always easy to hold onto that vision. I remember times when my teens didn’t quite fit in with their peers. They couldn’t relate to conversations about school dances or strict teachers or late-night cram sessions. That stung a little for both of us. It made me wonder if we were doing the right thing. It also made it really clear that I needed to help them find their own confidence. That I needed to build in enough structure for them to truly own their learning, not just float through it.

That’s where picking our curriculum comes in.

Sometimes, especially when life is hectic, we grab a program just because it’s there. “We need to do science, and this one ships fast.” We've all had years like that. But when we’re constantly stuck in holding patterns like that, we can lose sight of our bigger goals.

Holding patterns are okay. We all land in them. In fact, they can be a useful place to be while you find your why.

Start by closing your eyes and imagining your children are grown and graduating from high school. Picture the kind of person you want them to be. Do they know four languages? Can they play an instrument? Are they involved in their community? Are they helpful? Write down all the ideas that come to you. Now look at them carefully. Some of those things are outside your area of control. If your child hates learning one foreign language, you are going to have a really hard time making them learn four. Some of those things are in your control. You can make sure they know how to do chores.

For the things that are outside your control, examine why you want your child to have that skill. Those things might be inside your area of control. You may not be able to make your child learn four languages, but you can help them learn about other cultures and meet people from different walks of life.

Once you know your why and it matches what you can control, look at the choices in front of you. Does the curriculum on your shelf support that vision? Does your daily rhythm? If not, it is time to make some adjustments. The right curriculum should support your end goal. If you want your kids to be independent thinkers, the materials you use should help them practice that. If your vision is for self-directed learning, then the curriculum should be written to the student, not just for the parent to spoon-feed. It should ask good questions, encourage curiosity, and make space for meaningful exploration—not just checkbox learning.

Homeschooling isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being intentional. And when you begin with the end in mind, you’re already on the right track.